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Episode 26: August of 2005 - Week 1
August 10, 2005 12:13 p.m. (Baghdad Time)
Al Asad, Iraq
By LCpl Sincioco
Revised on August 18, 2005
"You proceed from a false assumption: I have no ego to bruise."
—Spock, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
I Love You Sin
One afternoon I went back to the Tin Can after my shift was over. I turned on the light and placed my gear in front of the newly setup TV next to my wall locker. I didn’t even notice it at first until Corporal Porter said something.
“Healey did that?” he said.
“Did what?” I asked.
He pointed to the TV where Healey had connected his laptop to project his screen saver while he slept.
“I Love You Sin,” the screen saver read, as it bounced around in 3-D.
I laughed.
“Healey, he’s such a funny guy,” I remarked. And immediately I thought of LCpl Mummey because he is the only one I know who would do something off-the-wall like that.
What brought about Healey’s unique way of showing gratitude is I purchased Media Center 11 from the internet, a software he recommended just a week ago, to play MP3s. I didn’t know at the time that he was using Media Center 10, so I gave him a copy of the new version along with the registration key. It would appear that he wanted to let the whole world know how thankful he was, so he left his computer on connected to the TV with a message that more than conveys it.
When he woke up later in the evening, I greeted him with the same greeting I used to give Schuster. “Rise and shine, sunshine!” even though it was 9:30 in the evening. He smiled as he cleared his eyes.
“That’s pretty funny, Healey,” I said.
“Hehe, I knew you would get a kick out of that,” he replied as he stretched.
“Is the Healey Operating System (HOS) still booting up?” I asked.
Being a Data guy, he picked it up just like Schuster did.
“Yeah,” he smiled.
The Company Doctor
But, it was no smiling matter when the Company Doctor saw me at the chow hall one afternoon. I was eating by myself, pigging out as usual with ice cream and cookies to complement my normal meal; everything I need to stay as one lean Data Marine.
The Doc was about to leave the chow hall, but he saw me. He sat down in front of me.
“Have you heard from the [medical] Chief?” he asked seriously.
“No, why?”
“They found a discrepancy in your medical record,” he said sadly.
I searched my mind for any possible anomaly that could show up in my medical record. I don’t have any medical condition of any kind to my knowledge, so I couldn’t think of any anomaly that may have arisen.
“Like what?” I asked.
“I’m not sure yet, but I have to review your medical record. Come by at 1300,” he ordered.
I thought to myself, “Great, I’m being ordered by the Company Doctor to pay him a visit. That is not good!”
“And I may have to put on my white gloves,” he threatened.
“Awesome, now the family jewels are going to get molested by the doctor!” I thought.
Confused I asked, “Are you serious, Doc?”
“Yeah,” he replied solemnly.
“Great, MEPS all over again,” I replied. MEPS is where everyone got their complete physical exam before joining the Armed Forces.
“I’m just fucking with you, Sin,” the good Doctor confessed.
Relieved, I replied, “That’s fucked up, Doc!”
Knee Pads
What’s fucked up was when I told Sgt Williams I was going to see 1stSgt Holt at the Company Office one morning to give a personal demonstration of the database I had been working on. It’s a database that keeps track of Marine’s misconducts such as, traffic violations, housing violations, Page 11s, NJPs, etc.
“I’m going to the First Sergeant’s office to demonstrate him his database,” I said to Sgt Williams.
“Don’t forget your knee pads,” he advised.
It took me about a second before I picked up the innuendo; it was a remark I did not expect from Sgt Williams.
“Is that advice from experience, Sergeant?” I asked.
MSgt Smith started laughing and said, “He got you Sergeant, he got you bad.”
“My job here is done. I have taught him well,” Sgt Williams gracefully recovered.
Marine Tracking Database
First Sergeant is the man you don’t want to see, unless you are in some kind of trouble; hence, the need for a database that keeps track of Marines’ misconducts. As I step foot on the Company Office, I noticed the following people on deck: First Sergeant Holt, Sergeant Major Kennedy and Master Gunnery Sergeant Jordan talking to each other. Any Lance Corporals would have been uneasy by the great pantheons [important people] before him, but not I.
I went straight for 1stSgt Holt who was expecting me and shook his hand.
“Great timing, Sin. I was just about to leave,” he replied as he shook my hand.
“How are you doing, First Sergeant?” I asked.
“Good, good. And yourself?”
“Good as always. Afternoon gentlemen,” I said to Sergeant Major Kennedy and to Master Gunnery Sergeant Jordan standing next to him.
It was the second time in the day I had been in the First Sergeant’s office. Earlier in the day, I was collecting business requirements for the database; sketching on my notepad as I were. It is a far greater challenge to develop software for the Marine Corps than in the civilian world as even those high-up in the chain of command are not as familiar with computers and its capabilities as compared to business folks. But, gathering business requirements from users who are not well-versed in computers is a skill I have long developed.
I began by asking him what information he wanted to capture. And more importantly, what did he want to do with this information. Did he want a report in the end? If so, what information did he wanted to see on the report, as that would govern the design of the program. As my line of questioning continued it excited him as he began to think of things he has not thought of. When asked when would the program would be ready, I said by the end of my shift which was only 6 hours later.
Six hours came and went, there I was again at the First Sergeant’s Office. I connected my USB thumb drive to his USB hub and double-clicked the new database. As I gave him a tour of the database, he couldn’t stop saying “Wow, this is great” or “Wow, this is so cool.” 1stSgt Holt was like a baby with a candy. The Sergeant Major and Master Gunnery Sergeant walked in and the First Sergeant proudly paraded his new toy.
“MSgt Smith helped me figure out what the possible values are for the drop down list. For instance, I wouldn’t know what the possible reasons are why Marines get NJPed. I suppose that’s a good thing,” I joked.
Everyone laughed.
I walked out of that office like a doctor having just delivered a cure to a terminally ill patient. First Sergeant Holt was pleased with the database. Just how pleased I didn’t realize until the next day.
Pros and Cons
As I was having dinner with a group of 8th Comm folks the next day, I casually mentioned to SSgt Stanton that I had developed a database for 1stSgt Holt.
“I know, he called me about it,” SSgt Stanton informed me.
“Really?”
“Yeah, he wanted to know how to get a hold of 1stSgt Corbin.” 1stSgt Corbin is my own First Sergeant in Fallujah (8th Comm’s).
“Why is that?” I asked.
“He wanted to have your Pros and Cons changed to 4.9/4.9.”
“Yeah right,” I impugned (cast doubt upon).
“I’m serious,” SSgt Stanton reaffirmed.
I thought, “Wow, what a nice gesture!” but a bit late. My Pros and Cons for the quarter had already been submitted to 8th Comm weeks ago and have already posted in MOL (Marine On-line). Hey, it’s the thought that counts, right?
Lance Corporal Delegation
And speaking of thoughts, Captain Lane walked in the DSID. He sat down because he thought of something.
“Sin, maybe you should show me how to create one of those slideshows before we get out of here.”
“Sure, sir,” I replied.
Lt. Torres walked in.
“Actually, sir. Lt Torres can probably show you how,” I continued.
A few weeks ago, I showed Lt Torres how to create slideshows. I was trying to save the good Captain some face by having another officer teach him something as supposed to a Lance Corporal, but he didn’t quite see it that way.
“Now, is this a ‘I can do what ever I want Lance Corporal Day?’ Since when does a Lance Corporal delegate work to an officer,” he asked in a joking manner.
I laughed.
“On second thought, I’d better show you, sir,” I tried to recover.
“Thank you! And I knew that YOU were going to,” he emphasized.
“Roger that sir.”
I laughed.
Backstreet Boys
One morning, Captain Lane, the Commanding Officer of Alpha Company, sat next to me.
“What’cha got there, Sin?”
“Just listening to Backstreet Boys, sir.”
“What the fuck, Sin? You are a United States Marine. Why are you listening to the Backstreet Boys?” he asked jokingly.
“Let me turn it up for you, sir,” I antagonized.
“Oh, you shouldn’t have done that.”
“I’m just messing with you, sir.”
He shook his head left to right while keeping a grin. I’m sure if I had been any other Lance Corporal he would have chewed my ass.
The Bunker
What will save my ass for the next rotation is the bunker that we are moving into. I got a chance to see it last night.
“I can’t believe we are at war,” Sgt Poulin remarked.
He turns up the radio while Shaina Twain kept our spirits high.
“At 2 o’clock in the morning here are the four of us, driving around base in a PoV [personally owned vehicle], trying to find a bunker just for the fun of it,” he continued.
“If anyone asks, we are in route to Remote TechCon,” LCpl Padgett reminded us.
“This is my second time in a PoV,” said Cpl Weller.
“In my case, I’ve lost track,” I added to the conversation.
When we found the bunker, it reminded me of Blair Witch; it was dark, dusty and spooky. All we had were two LED flashlights to light the way. We actually had so much fun in the bunker that we inspected every nook and cranny of it and came out all filthy. We even practiced getting out of the bunker through the escape route, a long ladder-well that led to the very top of the bunker leading outside.
Sgt Poulin took a bunch of pictures. We noticed that there were 4 new drops of fiber just recently installed in the bunker and a new copper switchboard. The bunker is pretty big, probably as big as the TACC building. Unlike the TACC building which houses several groups of people in it, the bunker will only house Comm people for the next rotation. If anyone of those rooms gets assigned to DSID, it would be bigger than the working space I have now.
Finished First Online Class
And speaking of working, I just finished working on my first computer class last night—Computer Information Systems. I got my book a few days ago and within 48 hours, I had already read all the relevant chapters I needed to complete all 4 tests. That’s supposed to be two months of work done in 48 hours, and I still got an A!
My next class is an English class, and after that, my next six classes are all computer-related which should be a walk in the park. The only classes that will slow me down are the Calculus and Physics classes. By the time the next rotation is over, I should have completed a semester or two of college. Not bad for a deployed Marine. The only thing I’m killing while I’m out here in Iraq is time—productively.
—LCpl Sincioco
United States Marine Corps,
8th Comm BN, Support Co., Data Platoon
"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
—Mark Twain (1835-1910)
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